Things That Can Go Wrong on Your Wedding Day (And How to Handle Them)

Lindsay Ladd is a candid wedding and event photographer based in Baltimore, Maryland, serving couples across DC, Maryland, Delaware, and beyond. With 12 years and hundreds of weddings photographed, Lindsay specializes in LGBTQ+ weddings and is internationally recognized for her work with queer couples.

The Truth About Wedding Days

I'll let you in on a major wedding day secret: there aren't perfect wedding days, something inevitably goes wrong, and that's completely okay. In all the weddings I've photographed over more than a decade, I have never once seen a perfect wedding day. Not one. And I've seen some absolutely stunning, joyful, deeply moving wedding days. The secret is that perfection and joy have very little to do with each other.

Every couple I've ever worked with has experienced at least one thing that didn't go according to plan. A seam that popped. A florist who showed up late. A family member who had a little too much to drink before the ceremony started. Rain on an outdoor ceremony. A flower child that refuses to go down the aisle.

Here's what I've also seen: none of those things ruined a single wedding. The couples who enjoy their day most are the ones who expect that something will go sideways and decide in advance to roll with it. Your guests remember the love, the laughter, and the joy. They don't remember that the timeline slipped by 20 minutes or that someone's boutonnière fell off during cocktail hour.

So consider this your permission slip to let go of perfect and embrace realness. And while you're at it, let me share everything I've learned about handling the unexpected, so you can walk into your wedding day feeling prepared for whatever comes your way.

Before You Even Leave the House

Wardrobe Malfunctions

Wardrobe malfunctions are among the most common wedding day surprises, and they can be easily managed with a little preparation. Before your wedding day, put together an emergency kit and make sure someone in your wedding party is responsible for bringing it. Your kit should include:

• A needle and thread in colors that match your wedding outfits

• Scissors

• Fashion tape (an absolute lifesaver for gaps, hems, and anything that needs to stay in place)

• Safety pins in multiple sizes

• A lint roller

• Aspirin or ibuprofen

• Antacids

• Bandages (someone will get blisters)

• Stain remover wipes

• Breath mints

• A small sewing kit

Having these items on hand means that a broken strap, a popped button, or a hem that comes loose goes from a crisis to a two minute fix.

The Details That Photograph Beautifully

If you want those really nice detail photos of the things you'll be wearing, or the small items of the wedding day, make a plan with your photographer. Have a couple nice wooden hangers on hand to display the wedding outfits. Wire hangers and plastic hangers simply don't photograph well; and, while you're at it, throw in a couple command strip hooks in case there isn't a spot to hang the wedding outfit to be photographed.

Similarly, if you have cards, stationery, invitations, or any meaningful paper items you'd like photographed, don't forget to bring them. The same goes for rings, heirlooms, jewelry, perfume bottles, or any small meaningful objects. Have it all together in one spot, ready for the photographer so they're not trying to round up 10 different random objects in 10 different rooms.

Hair and Make up Delays

Hair and make up running over time is the single most common cause of late ceremony starts, and I say that with complete love and zero judgment. Getting ready takes longer than expected almost every single time. Hair and makeup artists are professionals who take pride in their work, and sometimes that work takes a little longer than the original estimate.

The solution is simple: build buffer time into your getting ready schedule. If your hair and makeup artist says the process will take four hours, block out four and a half or five hours.

Don't Forget the Important Documents

It sounds obvious, but in the whirlwind of wedding morning, important items get left behind more often than you'd think. The night before your wedding, designate one person, not yourself and not your partner, to be responsible for making sure the following items make it to the ceremony:

• The marriage license

• Your written vows if you've prepared them

• Rings

• Any items being incorporated into the ceremony

Make a checklist. Check it the night before and again the morning of. Assign a person. This is not the day to rely on memory alone.

Getting to the Ceremony

Unexpected Traffic and Delays

Here is something I want every couple to hear: almost every wedding starts a little later than the time stated on the invitation. Guests arrive slowly, family members need an extra few minutes, and the timeline almost always shifts by at least ten or fifteen minutes. This is normal. This is expected. This is not a crisis.

Also, sometimes the traffic gods decide to throw you a curveball and there's an accident that prevents some of the guests from arriving on time, or, perhaps there's a naked bike ride happening in the city and everything is delayed - if that's the case, roll with it and have fun and either take a break or take some fun photos!

A cyclist during the Philly Naked Bike Ride pauses to wish a wedding couple congratulations

To keep guests comfortable and in good spirits during any delay, consider having a drink station or welcome drinks available as guests arrive. A hydrated, comfortable guest who has something cold to sip on is a happy guest, even if they're waiting a little longer than planned. It sets a warm, welcoming tone for the entire day and takes the pressure off the timeline completely. Some weddings I've seen have champagne offered upon arrival, which is a very classy touch.

And for your own peace of mind, build travel buffer into your day. If the ceremony venue is thirty minutes away, budget 45 minutes. Traffic, parking, and the general unpredictability of moving a group of people from one place to another means that extra time is always needed.

Weather Surprises

If you're planning an outdoor ceremony, have a backup plan and make sure everyone involved knows what it is. Talk to your venue in advance about what happens if it rains. Know where you'll move, who makes the call, and how guests will be informed.

And, if there is no back up plan? Roll with it.

Rain unexpectedly started falling during a ceremony that I was photographing outdoors in a park. The couple paused the proceedings and turned and asked the audience if they should move to the pavilion or stay and continue,....and everyone in the crowd cheered at the "stay and continue". A guest ran up to the couple and handed them a giant umbrella as other guests shared umbrellas with strangers who didn't bring one. The ceremony continued, in the rain, and threaded with a strong sense of unity and caring.

There is something about a host of people standing together under an umbrella, smiling in the middle of a downpour, that is more beautiful and more real than a perfectly sunny day. If it rains on your wedding day, let it. Embrace it. Some of your favorite photos might come from it.

During the Ceremony

Technology Failures

Microphones cut out. Music doesn't play. Slideshows freeze at the worst possible moment. Technology is wonderful right up until the moment it isn't, and wedding days have a particular talent for finding that moment.

The best defense against technology failures is a designated point person who is not you and not your partner. This should be someone with the contact information for every vendor, access to the venue's AV equipment, and the calm demeanor to handle a problem without creating a scene. A trusted friend, a family member, or a day-of coordinator can fill this role beautifully. Additionally, have a backup playlist downloaded on someone's phone just in case the DJ or sound system has issues. It's a five minute preparation that could save a very stressful situation.

Unexpected Emotions

Weddings are emotional. People cry, sometimes people faint, and occasionally someone gets so overwhelmed with joy that they completely lose composure in the most wonderful way. None of this is a problem. All of it is human.

To handle the practical side of unexpected emotions, make sure tissues are tucked away in multiple locations: with some members of the wedding party, on a table near the front of the ceremony space. If you're worried about makeup, waterproof everything and have your makeup artist or a trusted friend nearby for touch ups before photos.

And if someone faints? Stay calm, let the people around them handle it, and know that in most cases it's a combination of heat, nerves, and not enough water. Make sure your wedding party has had water and something to eat before the ceremony begins.

Children & Pets at the Wedding

Ahh, the glorious unpredictable chaos that only pets and children bring to an occasion! Despite the added stress, they are almost always the source of the most hilarious and entertaining moments of the entire day.

I'll let you in on a secret - when children or pets go off script, the guests love it. They eat it up when a flower child sits down and decides smell every single petal in her basket. Or a dog that decides the wedding cake display is far more interesting than being a good little ring bearer pup.

If you're including pets in your wedding day, designate a specific person whose only job is managing that pet. Not a wedding party member or close family who will probably have other responsibilities. One person, a neighbor or a cousin, fully dedicated to making sure your dog walks down the aisle on cue, gets their portrait taken, and then gets safely handed off or taken home before the reception begins. Having a clear plan for where the pet goes after their moment in the spotlight prevents a lot of potential chaos later on.

For children, the same principle applies. Brief your flower and ring children in advance, make it feel fun and exciting rather than pressured, and then completely let go of any expectation of how it will actually unfold. In my experience the kids who are given zero pressure perform beautifully, and the ones who feel the weight of expectation are the ones who end up refusing to walk down the aisle when the moment comes.

My advice for both children and pets: lean into it. Don't try to control it. The unplanned moments with kids and animals become the stories couples tell for the rest of their lives, and as a photographer those chaotic, joyful, completely unscripted moments are some of my absolute favorites to capture. Embrace the chaos. It's the good kind.

LGBTQ+ Specific Considerations

For my fellow LGBTQ+ couples, there are a few unique situations worth thinking through in advance so you can handle them gracefully on the day.

Misgendering during the ceremony can happen, whether from an officiant who missteps, a family member making a toast, or a vendor who hasn't been fully briefed. Talk to your officiant in advance about names, pronouns, and how you'd like the ceremony framed. Brief your key vendors. And designate a trusted person who can quietly and calmly address any issues as they arise without disrupting the flow of the day.

Chosen family dynamics are one of the most beautiful things about LGBTQ+ weddings. Think through your family photos list carefully and include the people who are truly your family, regardless of biology. Communicate that list to your photographer in advance so nobody who matters gets missed.

If you have family members who are less than fully affirming, allow your partner to be your buffer. You don't need to manage difficult family dynamics alone on your wedding day. Identify in advance which family members might need handling and assign a trusted friend or family member to keep an eye on those situations so you can stay present and enjoy your day.

Finally, if you have any concerns about a venue or vendor's level of affirmation, address them directly and in advance. There are many vendors and venues that directly state on their website or marketing material identifying they are an ally. Also, even if that isn't explicitly stated, they may still be a supporting ally. Listen to your gut and ask specific questions during the booking process and if something feels off, seek out a few more vendors to interview. You may end up having to do a bit more legwork up front, but the payoff of having a genuinely supportive team alongside you on your wedding day is unparalleled.

Family Dynamics and Photos

Navigating Family Drama

Family dynamics are complicated in the best of circumstances. Add the heightened emotions of a wedding day and things can get interesting. The most important piece of advice I can offer here is simple: allow your partner to be your buffer.

You do not need to personally manage every difficult family member on your wedding day. Decide in advance that your job on your wedding day is to be present, to be joyful, and to enjoy the person you're marrying. Your partner's job is the same. Difficult conversations, hurt feelings, and family politics can wait until after the honeymoon.

If there are specific family situations you're concerned about, brief a trusted friend or family member in advance. Give them the context they need and ask them to run gentle interference if things start heading in the wrong direction. Taking that responsibility off your plate is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself on your wedding day.

Getting Through Family Photos Efficiently

Family photos are one of the most logistically complex parts of any wedding day, and they can eat up a surprising amount of time if they're not managed well. Pro Tip: if you have large families, blended families, or if you're included extended family in posed photos, designate one family member to assist the photographer during this portion of the day.

This person should know everyone on their side of the family, be comfortable calling out names loudly in a crowd, and be able to gather the right people for each grouping quickly and efficiently. They become the photographer's right hand during family portraits, rounding people up, keeping the energy moving, and serving as an extra set of eyes for details the photographer might miss while looking through a lens. Are anyone's ties crooked? Does someone have food in their teeth? Is grandma's collar folded in? Your family coordinator catches these things so the photographer can focus on capturing the moment.

Prepare a specific family photo shot list in advance and give it to both your photographer and your family coordinator. The more organized this portion of the day is, the more time you'll have for the portraits and candid moments that truly tell the story of your wedding.

The Reception

Vendor Lateness or No-Shows

It's rare but it happens: a vendor is late, has an emergency, or in very rare cases doesn't show up at all. The best protection against this scenario is preparation.

Make sure one person, again ideally not you or your partner, has the contact information for every single vendor involved in your wedding day. This person should be empowered to make calls, solve problems, and communicate updates without pulling you away from your day. A wedding planner or day-of coordinator is the obvious choice for this role. If you don't have a coordinator, a highly organized and calm friend or family member can fill the role beautifully.

Having vendor contracts that include backup or emergency contact provisions also helps. When you're booking vendors, ask what their plan is if they have an emergency on the day of your wedding. A professional vendor will have an answer.

Taking Care of Yourself

Remember to Eat and Drink Water

I say this with complete sincerity because I have watched it happen at more weddings than I can count: couples forget to eat and drink on their wedding day. You are so busy greeting guests, taking photos, managing the timeline, and being present for everyone around you that the basic act of feeding yourself simply slips through the cracks.

Please eat something before the ceremony. Please drink water throughout the day. Designate someone, your maid of honor, your best man, a trusted friend, to physically hand you food and water at regular intervals throughout the day. I will remind you myself when I'm with you, because a well fed and hydrated couple is a happy couple, and a happy couple makes for extraordinary photographs.

Be Present

This is the hardest piece of advice to follow and also the most important. Your wedding day will go by faster than you expect. The morning feels long and then suddenly you're at the reception and it's almost over and you're wondering where the day went.

Do your best to put down the mental to-do list. Let the people you've trusted with various responsibilities handle their responsibilities. Look around the room at the people who came to celebrate you. Hold your partner's hand. Dance when you want to dance. Cry when you feel like crying. Laugh at everything.

The unplanned moments, the things that go sideways, the surprises and the chaos, those are the moments that make your wedding day yours. The most beautiful wedding days are never the most perfectly executed ones. They're the ones where the couple showed up fully, loved each other loudly, and let the day be exactly what it was.

The Bottom Line

If this list seems overwhelming or is causing extra stress, consider hiring a wedding planner if you haven't already (they're worth their weight in gold). They handle each and every one of these issues and they do it in a behind-the-scenes way so you often have no idea that something is amiss.

If a planner/coordinator is outside the budget, no worries, you've got this. No wedding goes perfectly. The ones that feel perfect are the ones where the couple decided in advance to roll with whatever happens. The unplanned moments are almost always the most memorable, the most human, and often the most beautiful to photograph.

If you're planning a wedding in Baltimore, DC, Maryland, Delaware or beyond, and especially if you're an LGBTQ+ couple looking for a photographer who has helped hundreds of queer couples celebrate, check out my portfolios above and hit me up: gingerfoxphoto@gmail.com